A Mother Far from Home

on becoming supermom


How to prevent having children who are always “bored”

how to stop your children from always being bored

In the words of my wise grandmother… boring people get bored.

Now I know that is cold, but let’s be honest. In a world where there are 1,583,353 things to do at every waking moment, being bored simply means you are ready for the next thing to entertain you because you can’t be bothered to entertain yourself. I was an only child and still had to go play outside and find something to do. And you know what? I cannot remember the last time I’ve even thought of being bored as a possibility.

I am from the country and my high school friends and I are from a really – and I mean 8,000 people small – small town. I have a memory of us away at college (Go Gators) in a town with about 45,000 college students where we made a few friends from the big city. About 10 of us were sitting in our living room and one of our big city friends said “I’m bored, what are we going to do?” I looked at my small town friends and said, “What does she mean what are we going to do? We’re sitting here talking…aren’t we already doing it?” Come to find out, she meant what kind of activity are we going to do or where are we going to go to eat or be entertained or see something cool. I’m sure we eventually went out, but it really got me thinking. We small town kids were used to entertaining ourselves and thinking of inventive things to do while our big city friends were used to being entertained. What sounds more fun to you? Playing hide and go seek in your cars with walkie-talkies or going bowling?

We were used to being creative and they were used to receiving the fruits of others’ creativity. There is a big difference.  And trust me, one is easier to live with as a characteristic in your children than the other.

1) You are not their 24-hour birthday party paid entertainer. We will love our kiddos and want their smiles, laughter and hugs. Of course, it’s great fun to play horsey and peekaboo and do all manner of things to see them happy when they are babies, but being the nonstop source of entertainment for your child (sort of like your smartphone is for you) will get old very quick. You do not need to be the one to pick out every game, activity, book, Barbie or video. They are opinionated and are discovering their interests so let them have a say. If you have more than one or two children with you at home and they all are in constant need of you to stimulate their brains all.day.long you will quickly lose patience for it all. And we know that losing patience is a one way ticket off the happy cycle.  Continue reading



Desperate Housewife Syndrome: Signs, Symptoms + Solutions

Long before anyone filmed anything on Wisteria Lane the desperate housewife syndrome was in full bloom. All over the world women were wearing pyjamas at 11am wondering how the women around them seemed to find time to match their fingernail polish with their outfit. Outfit? When was the last time I wore an “outfit?” Do jeans and a t-shirt count as an outfit? I think an outfit probably has to have a cute belt, cute shoes or cute earrings to make the cut. Hey, I do have a cute headband on. Oh, wait. That’s only to mask the fact I haven’t washed my hair in three days.

Times can get desperate at home. If you live far from your family like me then there are not always built in avenues for stress reduction and relief. This syndrome can appear even if you love staying at home with the kids and they are well-behaved and sleeping fine. It is not necessarily a sign that you are unhappy in your role, just that there are some things that need tweaking. It’s not only our children’s behaviour that we need to Weigh Test + Measure, but our own as well. For our own good.

Some Signs and Symptoms you have come down with Desperate Housewife Syndrome (list is not exhaustive as each personality is unique)

1) You wear pyjamas most days.

2) You get slack on daily habits you used to have. i.e. shaving, washing your hair, making the bed, tidying the house, etc.

3) You resent watching your husband leave the house each morning and are waiting for him at the door when he gets home.

4) You have no energy for fun activities with the kids or for trying out new things. Getting to 5 6 or 7 o’clock each evening is all you have in you.

5) You start to look back on your single years or early years of marriage with an extreme amount of unhealthy nostalgia.

6) You feel insecure around working mothers because you don’t feel you have anything to talk about and because you’re behind on current and world events… though you are quite caught up on what’s happening on Facebook. Continue reading